capitalq’s blog

LADY COP

Her skin is a shade of brown

It’s little bit beyond chocolate

And every time she smiles

I swear I gotta have it

From the first time I ever saw her

She became my destiny

I could hardly believe it

When she gave her number to me

But as the time passed by

I found out the reason why

We have so much in common

She had to give me a try

Her eyes seem to call out to me

Inviting me into share her space

Why is it I’m always running

But never seem to finish a race

I can’t even hide the truth

I’m having feelings I cannot stop

For some reasons I can’t explain

I’m falling for a Lady Cop

I said I can’t even hide the truth

These emotions I can’t explain

Even though I swore to myself

Not to ever fall in love again

We go out to the movies

And dinner in restaurants

She’s everything I need

And everything any man wants

I get so very excited

Just to even hear her voice

I don’t want to be without her

If only I had my choice

Cause… she has her own things going on

Her reasons for holding back

And even though we adore one another

I can’t get us on the right track.. And

No matter frequently we hang out

Or talk all night on the phone

Even after weeks with no contact

I can’t seem to leave her alone

I can’t even hide the truth

I’m having feelings I cannot stop

For some reasons I can’t explain

I’m falling for a Lady Cop

I said I can’t even hide the truth

These emotions I can’t explain

Even though I swore to myself

Not to ever fall in love again

A good strong woman is

Oh so very hard to find

And I’m so glad to have found one

But wish she would make up her mind

I know she can protect herself

She’s independent to the bone

The fact is two can do better than

One could ever do alone

Now I’m dreaming of handcuffs and bondage

Kissing her from head to toe

I imagine what it’s like to lay with her

But I’m fearing I may never know

Because we get our signals twisted

It’s hard for us to connect

And I try to play it too cool and…

Show her just due respect

Yet I know if we ever get together she

Would have me on such a short leash

And I would love it since childhood

My boys always told me I should fuck the police

And I can’t even hide the truth

I’m having feelings I cannot stop

For some reasons I can’t explain

I have fallen for a Lady Cop

I wouldn’t really hide it if I could

And I don’t feel the need to explain

I’m gonna do all I can do

To see my Lady Cop again

Just a quick throwback/shout out to prince.....  from the song Shoo Be Doo

"The answer to the question of life is a grey haired bitch at least.

Sucking on the Ebony dancer in between these dirty sheets

Spittin out the after taste of a boy that might not call again.

If this is the game you stood in line for

How are you gonna win?"

Woooo woo!  Just admire the imagery.

Okay, I sent this out early yesterday but then realized I was missing some people's emails.  If I missed you I do apologize.  things have been hectic in the house of Q.

The world would be such a better place
If Mothers ruled the land
They are wise, wonderful and caring
And always seem to understand

Having a baby is one thing
Being a Mother is a whole other level
If it was an Olympic event
They would introduce the platinum medal

This goes out to each and every
Outstanding mother in my life
Best Friend, Sister, Mother, Lover,
And yes, even the ex-wife

Motherhood is often a thankless job
But plenty women sign up for it any way
For that reason and many more I wish you
the absolute greatest this Mothers' Day!

HAPPY MOTHERS DAY!!!

So Tuesday after a long "interesting" day of work I hooked up with my homegirl from work and one of her crazy ass friends and hit the Wild Wing Cafe.  I was all kinds of hungry so I went for the big Bubba sammich with that oh so sweet Bubbas BBQ sauce.  Now of course it's upsetting to me that the Wild Wing here does not have the Bacardi Hurricanes on the drink roster, but alas they make a mean Long Island Ice Tea!  I mean for real.  It looks more like weak lemonade.  Anyway after eating and venting about work I was feeling all good.  (The 3 Long Islands didn't hurt either.)  Low and behold, it was Karaoke night.  My girls crazy/sexy/beautiful friend said we should get up on stage and do "Da Butt".  I was like cool and put our names on the list.  It was funny because about two slots before us 2 skinny white cats got up there doing Salt N Pepa's "Push It"!  Priceless!  Our turn came and I had my 3 and a half minutes of fame as a lead singer.  Have not had that much or that kind of fun in ages.... Owwwwwww! 

     On another note I have finally done it!  I have got all my writing supplies and am dilligently working on my novel and my first full length play in over a decade.  I will post some details and keep the updates coming.  I hope to form a small theater company here and start doing some original pieces.  I have been out of the game too long.  Seeing as how I am struggling to make it anyhow, I may as well try doing the things I love and try to at least be able to say I tried my best and yes......

I DID IT MYYYYY WAYYYYY!!!!

I was asked to partake of an evening in the theatre today.  the result of my time  has brought about thoughts and feeling of both Love and Hateration (It's not Ebonics, it is "poetic license")!   First of all I have to admit that I really do not like Tyler Perry's body of work.  I give him props for making his moves, but at some point I'd like to see him take it to the next level.  The theatre has been such a big part of the Black community in history and I wish we could get back to that.  With that said,  this play was to a Tyler Perry play... like a Wayans Brother flick to an old school Spike Lee joint!    Nevertheless I'm not going to get deep into a review on it.  I sat through the first decade of the play just waiting to get a glimpse of my friend that asked me to come.  When she did get on stage I was taken aback.  She was playing the "skeeza" who is always late and quite under dressed for a church environment.  HOnestly the being late thing fits her and she'd tell you that herself.  I can't say I ever saw her hoochified though.  Still I found myself in awe, just staring at her chocolaty silky smooth legs as if I'd never seen them before.  I've been trying to convince myself for months that her grip on me had been broken, but now I know that is far from the truth.  All the Hateration was directed at that play.  She and those well toned parallel pathways leading to her sweet center of womanly paradise got me thinking of Love and everything that comes with it.  The thing there is it wasn't just about her.  In the last year I have met 2 females who I honestly have to say I am totally intrigued by.  She would be one.  I used to work at the same spot as her.  We hit it off right away.  She fits the opposites attract cliche to me.  She's younger than me, an official southern girl who strives to be on the righteous path in God's eyes.  Heck she even spends New years in church.  Now I do believe in God and try to do the right thing, but me and church have been strangers for quite some time.  Now girl #2 and I have had much more in depth interactions.  I have to say I see her as my equal if not a bit higher up than me.  Well educated, motivated, and straight up no nonsense.  When she laughs I forget there is any other sound in the world.  So I bet you're wondering what the problem is?  Choosing between the two? Nope.  I could really see myself spending the rest of my days with either, making the world a better place for us and our children..... Just enjoying life and being a real family.  The issue then?.... I don't even know where to begin.  I have gotten so soft in my experience state of being(ie. age has gotten to me).  I can flirt and flatter any woman on the planet, but actually opening up and saying I want to hook up regularly or on a permanent basis is actually frightening beyond my wildest imagination.  I don't have fear of commitment, quite the opposite in fact.  I am a self diagnosed serial monogamist.  The things in my past have just made me "gun shy". 
     Probably the final straw was the state of my relationship with my last "girlfriend".  I was wide the hell open to the point of putting money on the table.  I have never in my life loaned or given money to even my closest friends.  She didn't even have to ask and I had her back, so much to the point I hurt myself financially and had to make sacrifices to get back on track. (Like not having a car for a year.)  A while back I had accepted it was over and I had to basically cut my losses and just be friends.  I saw she was going down a different path, which I was okay with given we had grown apart.  Then she dropped a bomb... followed by a potential bomb, then in stead of telling me what was up I found out the remaining detail via internet.  The icy reality of that let me know that either I never really mattered at all, or I still did and she had to keep me out the loop so I would not be an obstacle.  I would have done anything for her and did more for her than any other woman in my life.  I don't think my brain is willing to let me risk going out like that again. 

I had to put this quick rant up..... So on my free weekdays I occasionally work as a Substitute teacher.  On wednesday I filled in for a P.E. teacher at a middle school mind you.  There are two things that I need to comment on after that experience.  the first is the all out audacity of some of these young people these days.  I won't say I never had some thoughts about an attractive teacher from time to time back in my juvenile days, but no way in heck would I have even thought about acting on them.    So why is it I had little 7th and 8th grade girls pushing up on me?!  OMFG!!!  I about had to get a water hose out on these little hot mommas.  Asking for hugs and trying to get all in my business.  Had to issue the quick verbal smack down and stay in plain sight the whole day. It's a shame.

Now the other incident is just as bad but on a totally different level.  The very last class of the day and everyone has been getting along.  8th graders? No problems.  7th graders? No problems.  7th and 8th graders mixed together? Absolutely no problems!  6th graders?  Drama spectacular.  Towards the end of class the  Blacks all of a sudden had issues with the Hispanics.  The Blacks are fighting/crying mad and the Hispansics upsetting and talking fast as can be.  Somebody said the hispanics called them the "N" word in Spanish and I'm glad they can identify some Spanish vocabulary, but come on we need to get past that.  Besides, it didn't help his case that he said to his friend "Nigga, they called me a nigga in Spanish!"  Okay WOW.  I told them all they need to lay off that word and my poor misguided brown little brothers said they are proud of what they are.  (My take, I am not a NIGGER, NIGGA or any variation of it and you call me one and you will only do it once.)  Seriously though, I don't know why there is a rift between  the Latino and Black communities.  We are all brown folks and should get along.  Our cultures aren't all that different.  

ANYWAY... I will surely have more to say in coming weeks.  LATERS

END RANT 

Okay... I am officially shutting down.  Recent events have just totally drained my desire and motivation for writing pretty much anything.  I guess for the most part I will just call it a break, but who knows.  When I have a chance I will check on the locals and maybe even comment here and there.  I am in a funk and won't be back until I claw out of it.  So either later today or first thing tomorrow I will post my last blog for the foreseeable future.

Okay... now I know it is just a start... but I am actually kinda hyped by Janet's new joint.  Also the album looks good so far.  It really sounds like she is going back to what made me love her for so long in the past. (Aside of course from the fact she still is hott and sexy as hell.)  I have the video on loop so every time I'm not busy at work I just flip back to get refocused. LOL   I mean this is on that great creative level you don't get from your average artist.  this one takes me back to "What's It Gonna Be" with Busta.

http://www.janetjackson.com/site.php

Just showing some love.  I don't have much to say today. 

JayQ